Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Patient #11: The Poker



The Poker has a recent illness. This illness is the dreaded....

 Overly-Abundant Poker Disorder (OAPD)

Usually the disorder begins with harmless poking through instant messaging or Facebook. Soon, it escalates into a full blown poking war, where the person on the receiving end is bombard with endless, merciless poking. *pokes*
*clears throat* Bruises have been reported.


In the final stages of the disorder, *pokes* 

...the patient takes his or her poking outside the virtual world and into the real world. OAPD sufferers start out with friends and family poking, but then move on to random strangers. OAPD sufferers have been to walk by people and poke them in the side. They run off quickly so that they cannot be poked back.

Although there is no cure, two methods have been tried with a 47% rate (depending on the level of the illness.) 
*pokes* STOP THAT!

Chinese Finger Traps have been known to scale down the poke attacks. However, eventually OAPD sufferers escape to continue with their mass poking.
 Picture from Wiki
Total finger removal has the highest success rate, but severe cases of OAPD find other means of poking (eg. one's foot or elbow). This ends up being more painful for the pokee.


If you believe you have OAPD, please consult with your physicians. They should take the necessary precautions and meet with you in a full bubble suit.

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